Irishman
What do you call an Irishman sitting in your backyard?
Paddy O'Furniture
One Liners
No long setups, no complicated backstories. Just the fastest laughs on the internet.
Raining Cats and Dogs
Q. What's worse than raining cats and dogs?
A. Hailing taxicabs!
Redneck Baby
You might be a redneck if your baby's first words were, "Attention, K-mart shoppers!"
Numbers
If two's a company and three's a crowd... what's four and five?
NINE!!!!
Batty Books
Ghost Stories by I.C. Spooks
Rocket to the sun by R.U.Nuts
Your Book of Glamour by Q.T Pie
The Camel Ride by Major Bum - issore
How to Grow Shorter by Neil Down
How to Grow Taller by Stan Dup
Fooled you
What's another name for a push-up bra?
False advertisement
Baseball
The Chinese say: Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.
Man and car
Men who walk in front of car get tired. Men who walk in back of car get exhausted.
Ladies and Little People!
Q: What's the difference between a girls track team and a tribe of pygmies?
A: The pygmies are cunning little runts.
Middle Age
Middle Age: when knees buckle and belts don't.
Navy Dentist
Navy dentist's licence plate: TOP GUM
Poise
Poise: the ability to continue speaking fluently while the other fellow is picking up the cheque.
Laughs last
"He who laughs last, thinks slowest."
What's the difference?
What's the difference between a Ford and a golf ball?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
Snowmen vs Snowwomen
Q: What's the difference between Snowmen and Snowwomen?
A: Snowballs
Sumos
You're so fat you make sumos look anorexic.
Richard laughs
You're so fat Richard Simmons laughs at you.
Laugh
"He who laughs last, doesn't get the joke."
Barbie
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?
Math
There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can not!
Vacation
Vacation begins when dad says. "I know a shortcut"!
Energizer
Energizer Bunny arrested... charged with battery.
Lottery
Lottery, a tax on people who can't do math
Generalizations
all generalizations are false