Lightbulb
How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I don't know. They can't get the dead one out.
Lightbulb
How many jokes does it take to make someone laugh? Just finding the right one here.
Lawyer
How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They like to keep their clients in the dark!
Add Ons #1
You're pretty... pretty ugly!
You finally figured out how to screw in that lightbulb, but the power went out.
You're smart... smart as a fencepost!
The Teachers
How many teachers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two, one to turn it the other to grade the person.
Thats a Compromise!
Q: How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They merely change the standard to darkness and upgrade the customers.
ADD
Q. How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Hey, let's go ride bikes!
Light Bulb
Q: How many academics does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. That is what their students are for.
Colorguard Girls
Q: How many colorguard girls does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Five, one to call the colorguard forward and four to take it down with a ceremony.
Two Men
Man: How many asian people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Asian Man: Whats a lightbulb?
8 Men
How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: 8 men, One to get off the couch, One to find a lightbulb, One to find a ladder, One to screw it in, One to shock himself and shock everyone around, One to call a docter, One to find out that it wasn't out, the switch was off, and finally, one to sit back in laugh!
How Many Men? (a Variation)
How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One, men will screw anything.
How Many Irishmen...
How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: 50... 1 to hold the lightbulb, and 49 to drink 'till the room spins!
How Many Acountants Do It.......
Q. How many acountants does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. 1 at a fixed rate of 3.5% income return after purchase for every bulb replaced over a 6 year plan, with projected inflation expected to rise to over $1.25 per bulb in 2006.
End of the World
How long does it take a blond to change a lightbulb?
They never change it, by the time they've realized that it's broken, the world would of ended.
Blisters on Her Lips
Why did the blond have blisters on her lips?
From trying to blow out lightbulbs!
Women With PMS
Why does it take 3 women with PMS to change a lightbulb?
BECAUSE IT JUST DOES, OK!!!!
Blondes and Lightbulbs Don't
How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Zero: For all blondes know, the lightbulb is still burning bright.
Rich People
How many rich people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. They hire people to do it for them.
Certification....
How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, but it takes a certified electrician to make it work.
How Many Newfies
Q: How many newfies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: 2 one to hold the light bulb and 1 to spin him round and round.
Band
How many drummers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
5... 1 to try and fail, 3 to stand around and pretend to be musicians, and 1 to actually do it right.
How many trumpet players does it take to screw in a light bulb?
3... 1 to do it, and 2 to say they can do it better.
How many tuba players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
2... 1 to crush the lightbulb, and the other to fight about it.
Jazz Musicians
How many jazz musicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Don't worry about the changes, we'll fake it!
Note: In jazz, the chord changes are what dictates the improvisation of the music.
How Many Wizards Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?
How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. Wizards don't use lightbulbs!
How Many...
Q: how many men does it take to screw in a light bulb
A: 3, one to screw in the light bulb an 2 to listen to him brag about the "srewing" part