Johnny's in Trouble. . .again!
Music Teacher: Anyone has a suggestion to which song we should play next?
Johnny: How 'bout we sing 'The Teacher is A Big Fat Bitch. . .in C-Minor?'
School
Sharpen your pencils and prepare to laugh at the best teacher and classroom jokes.
CPSU Congress
"My wife has been going to cooking school for three years." / "She must really cook well by now!" / "No, they've only reached the part about the Twentieth CPSU Congress so far."
I Am Your FATHER!
Lady on telephone: "Hello sir, I want to meet & talk to you. You are the father of one of my kids."
Guy (stunned!):
Are you Sandra?
No.
Jenny?
No.
Amy?
No.
Betty?
No.
Lady (in confusion):
"No sir, I'm your son's class teacher."
Blonde
Teacher: The reason why we see lightening before we hear thunder is because light travels faster than sound.
Blonde student: How do you explain a CLAPPER?
The Sun
One day, a kindergarten teacher, who was incidentally blonde, gave everybody a set of crayons and told them to draw something with it.
The teacher noticed that Little Johnny had drawn a sun enclosed in a box with rays shining out of it.
'Johnny,' said the teacher with a confused look. 'Did your grandparents come from Japan?'
'No, Macedonia,' said the colour blind child.
News Flash
Today's school kids are spending less time at recess than their predecessors. Experts say if the trends continues, future Congressmen may not have enough experience goofing off.
Religious Teacher
Little Katie was at Sunday school one day. The teacher asked the class "Who is someone in your life that worships God by always speaking His name?"
Little Katie raised her hand and said "The fifth grade teacher at my school! Every time we pass by her room on the way to art I hear her say "I swear to God I have the worst behaved class in the world!"
You've Got The Wrong(est) Number
You've Got The Wrong(est) Number
(Note: our customer support number is close to a local driving school's number.)
Me: "Thank you for calling. How may I help you?"
Customer: "How much for my daughter?"
Me: "Um..."
Customer: "She's 16. It's her first time. She needs training."
Me: "Sir, I think you want the driving school."
Customer: "Oh, what do you guys do?"
Me: "Adult websites."
Customer: "Oh...OH! Oh my God!"